For Adam; Karen; and Ellen:

At the beginning of this course, I wrote in my writing sample that I hoped to produce poetry that was a better portrayal of some conscientiousness and maturity. I certainly believe the discussions we had, the poetry we read, and the feedback I received in this class have aided my growth in these respects. In our discussions, I consistently felt challenged to consider and evaluate my own points of view. There was something naturally inquisitive about speaking about what I would normally read in silence, explaining why specific parts of texts were meaningful, and realizing connections in my own life and the wider landscape of writing and the world. I enjoyed that, every week, there was always a new variety of poems I was able to draw points of questioning and learning from. Especially since the poems in one packet touched on the same topic, I was better able to pinpoint differences in form, techniques, and approach—and among these, the specifics I wanted to emulate in my own writing. Moreover, before this class, I had never been exposed to such a large volume of poetry in such a short amount of time. The experience of being inundated with poetry, having those hours in the week when every minute was saturated with nothing but the words on the page and my own thoughts, was new and delightful. Furthermore, throughout this course, the feedback I received was different from any other workshop I had been a part of before. I had never received such a wide variety of suggestions, ones that differed in perspective, opinion, and focus. It was refreshing to realize the critiques and concerns strangers may have as they read my poetry, and to have a sense of direction as I revised my works.

Among the many learnings I have taken away from our course, the one that has stayed with me is to let poetry function as a form of exploration. With my own poetry, I worry that I have let writing image after image, without including any real introspection, become a bad habit of mine. Originality in diction and imagery is what I try to emphasize in most of my poems; but now, I am more determined to use my writing as a vehicle for questioning and discovery. This course has also emphasized to me the importance of embracing weird, decidedly unaesthetic details. Previously, I had never associated over-sentimentality as being a flaw, but I have realized how avoiding it makes poetry evermore engaging, strange, and exciting. In this vein, I have attempted to experiment with discomforting, sometimes taboo, themes in my writing; however, in many ways, I fell short of treating these subjects with the entirety of their gravity and social significance. I have learned from feedback, and from reading other writing on these topics, the ways in which poets approach these topics with a purpose beyond simple depiction of a scene, and how this adds complexity and awareness to the poem itself. In the future, I hope to enhance the impact of my poetry past the portraits I create of people or scenes. Instead, with each poem, I will aim to end with something beyond what I am already aware of.

I feel like it is only right to end this reflection by mentioning that I have never, and likely never will again, be a part of a class quite like this one. When I first joined the Zoom and met Karen, and heard about her childhood and kids and grandkids, I felt moved in the sense that I could see the years of life I had ahead of me, and how the time I spent now would become memories of my future self. It led me to wonder what role my writing would play in creating and recording these memories, so has driven me to take inspiration from more of the little things around me, in addition to my imagination beyond personal experience. And in every class thereafter, this course has allowed me to pick apart and piece together the way I write, why I do, and all the reasons I love poetry. I will always be thankful to have been a part of this course, and am sure I will never forget it.